This breast friends thing is, like, so kinky. I mean, you don’t need to be a sex therapist to see that.
I know all about wet nurses and such but one of the most important aspects of breastfeeding is the bonding that goes on between mother and child.
Yes, breastfeeding can be a bit exhausting and draining (literally) but the big payback is the closeness with your baby. And that’s a beautiful thing for a developing infant.
As has been said, breast milk is one great nutritional product: it protects the baby’s immune system big time and provides them with just about everything they need.
But the bonding thing. That’s a big, big part of it and I don’t think a baby needs to bond with mom’s best friend in this way. I just don’t.
I’ve got nothing against kinky. But isn’t it just so obvious that those two heterosexual friends are attracted to one another? And there ain’t nothing wrong with that. Just come out with it.
Why use your baby to act out a sexual feeling between you and your friend? Why use your baby as a way to get closer to your friend (even platonically)?
Female friendships are complex. That’s why I’m all about boundaries even if I’m not always the best about upholding them. Healthy boundaries between friends is important. To me, this would be a case of too much too muchness.
I can already see the breakup of that friendship coming. And the ensuing Maelstrom. There are going to be some very SOUR feelings there. "I breastfed your baby…"
Come on, girlfriends, don’t put your baby in the middle of a female friendship fiasco. Whether it’s about sexual feelings for a friend or a desire to be closer or just the convenience angle (she vacuumed my rug, she breastfed my kid, what a friend) there ain’t no good can come from this.
I say, stay out of it. Bad. Bad. Bad idea.
Beautiful pix by Wendy Cooke on Flickr.
I know people who have traded babies on occasion for convenience–babysitting or somebody’s badly engorged and needs an extra mouth. I’ve never known anybody whose done it for bonding, but being an LLL dad, almost nothing seems strange to me.
The funny thing is, you’re right about them — kind of. They’re exes! Not sure why Jennifer Baumgardner failed to mention that in the piece. And she’s not heterosexual either (though I guess you could easily assume she was). She just wrote a book on bisexuality. In it, I believe you can read all about her relationship with her “Breast Friend.” There’s a Q&A with her about her book on Babble’s sister site, Nerve.com (http://www.nerve.com/screeningroom/books/interview_jenniferbaumgardner/).