Here’s this week’s Smartmom from the Brooklyn Paper:

On the sixth night of Hanukah, Smartmom asked Hepcat if he was in the mood to make potato latkes.

It
was a quiet Sunday evening on Third Street. The family had just lit the
jolly dancing Hasid menorah they bought at the Clay Pot.

By the
light of seven sparkling candles, the Oh So Feisty One enjoyed her
gift, a pair of pajamas for one of her Webkinz puppies while Teen
Spirit scanned his new copy of “The Golden Compass” — a good atheist
text on this, the holiday of miracles.

Smartmom could tell that Hepcat was mulling over her request because he googled “potato pancakes” in search of a recipe.

Despite how that sounds, Hepcat is the master chef in the family.

While
Smartmom is known for her short-order cooking — French toast, grilled
cheese and stir-fried vegetables and chicken, Hepcat goes in for the
labor intensive fare, including leg of lamb, risotto, chicken curry and
his famous fennel turkey pasta sauce.

And yes, Hepcat, that big hunk of a Presbyterian farm boy, is a connoisseur of the latke.

In
a way, it is through cooking and eating that Hepcat has assimilated to
life as a Jew. And this thrills Smartmom no end. He loves to prepare
the brisket for Passover, as well as the matzoh brei. And of course:
latkes on the holiday of the Maccabees.

Hepcat cooks the same way
he programs computers. He does a lot of research and then comes up with
his own plan. And that’s exactly what he did with the latkes. After he
looked at dozens of recipes and comments on the Internet, he was ready
to improvise.

Fearless in the kitchen, Hepcat loves to combine whatever is in the fridge. And he almost always comes up with something great.

First things first, the proper equipment needed to be located. In other words, where is the Cuisinart?

Smartmom and Hepcat got all mushy sentimental staring at that ancient wedding gift.

Like
them, it had yellowed a bit and after 19 years of use, it was looking a
little worse for the wear. But after a quick wash, it was good as new
and ready to shred potatoes and onions.

Wrrrrrrr went the onions.
Wrrrrr went the potatoes until they made a loud thud. “It sort of
sounds like a peacock falling off the roof,” Hepcat said, ever the
California farm boy.

Hepcat
is never happier than when he is cooking in the kitchen. Sometimes
Smartmom thinks he missed his calling. And when he cooks for the Jewish
holidays, Smartmom feels extra special because it means that he feels
part of her Jewish traditions as much as she feels part of his
Christian ones.

Smartmom watched lovingly as Hepcat combined the
ingredients for the latke batter adding more and more eggs until the
mixture looked right. There was no matzoh meal, so Hepcat found some
old matzoh from last Passover and pounded it into crumbs.

Frying
is Hepcat’s specialty. “The big secret,” Hepcat said, “is to make the
oil as hot as you can get it.” (Dumb Editor’s note: Two words:
Grapeseed oil.)

The house filled with the smell of burning oil
and smoke, and Smartmom opened the living-room windows to air things
out. As Teen Spirit and OSFO watched “Family Guy,” Hepcat prepared this
ancient holiday treat for his interfaith Jewish family.

So how
were the latkes? Smothered with applesauce and sour cream, they were
tasty indeed. Smartmom couldn’t stop herself from eating more than she
wanted to (her diet and all). Teen Spirit and OSFO ate quite a few.
There were even some extras for Mr. and Mrs. Kravitz downstairs.

While
Smartmom and Hepcat cleaned up in the kitchen, Hepcat said, “I have no
idea what I did, but I kept adjusting it until it seemed about right.”

Hepcat
may have been talking about latkes, but he could have been talking
about marriage and family life. Smartmom and Hepcat are winging it like
Hepcat did in the kitchen. Raising Teen Spirit and OSFO, living
together in the apartment, making a living, instilling values in their
kids, inventing a life together — it’s all on the fly.

A little
of this, a smidgen of that until it seems about right: it’s all an
improvisation, really. And that’s probably the best approach.

It certainly works for latkes.