Joan Jett was my Bowie.

In fact, when my orthodontist asked which band I’d like to see play my small town, I offered Bowie instead of Jett, whose mid-80s were so unpopular outside of my home I wasn’t sure he would remember who she was.

I have the greatest admiration for Kristen Stewart (more below). Dakota Fanning has long been a source of fascination. Since she was the youngest star in Hollywood, I’ve pretended she was my favorite actress as some sort of running gag. Friends I’ve lost touch with have been known to reach out to me after seeing her on a talk show the act was so strong.

Kim Fowley, the music biz figure who assembled The Runaways is on my short list of people I’ve most wanted to see a movie about because of his career on the edge of greatness and his over-the-line scumbag persona he perpetuates. Fowley is played by another actor I greatly admire – Michael Shannon. So, even the Twilight-obsessed have nothing on me when it came to waiting for The Runaways, the film about the teen girl rock pioneers. And the movie gets so much right. Carol Beadle’s costumes and Benoit Debie’s cinematography get the look and feel. But it’s the toilets and trailers, the chain link and leather that capture the real story. A perfectly framed gate closing on Cherie Currie (Fanning) once she’s stepped into the rock world, indicates director Floria Sigismondi understands that  rock music is not only about fulfilling your dreams, but also that those dreams are usually phony and often misguided.

The film also gets the music just right, celebrating the jams and providing the perfect links of glam and punk that define the sound of the Runaways and Jett’s career that would follow. Unfortunately, the movie hits a little soft. It’s more Almost Famous than Sid and Nancy – not necessarily a bad thing – but when we should be feeling the gut-punch of Currie’s family struggle, we’re back to everything since Jett’s own acting debut Light of Day. Likewise, Currie’s addiction story comes a few years after the parody Walk Hard confirmed that this has been overdone. But there is no denying Kristen Stewart. Rarely do rock biopics feature lead performances, like Joaquin Phoenix in Walk The Line, who created a real character rather than offering two hours of one spotlight-grabber impersonating another. Stewart manages both a spot-on recreation of Jett while also fleshing out a real character. I’m convinced she’s the future of Hollywood.

Crazy Lady has been busy lately. Just minutes after Teen Spirit left the apartment for his road trip to SXSW in Austin, Texas, she went into his room, popped his window open and unmade the bed.

“We need to fumigate in here,” she wailed.

Crazy Lady was right. But Smartmom promised Teen Spirit that she wouldn’t do anything drastic to his room. He was very firm with her.

“I will kill you if you redecorate,” he said.

Smartmom swore that she wouldn’t redecorate. But she did tell him that she had to do some cleaning in there. It had been ages since the floors were washed, the walls scrubbed and the whole room sanitized. He agreed, warily, to let her do some cleaning.

But Crazy Lady was going wild. She pulled all of his black-and-white marbled elementary school notebooks out of his closet. Same for his grade-school chapter books, video games that he doesn’t play anymore, clothing from when he was 8, infant snow boots, broken board games, jigsaw puzzles and ancient computers.

“Crazy Lady, don’t throw anything away. All that stuff needs to be packed up,” Smartmom warned her.

Crazy Lady had already created a mountain of detritus outside of Teen Spirit’s door.

Ever so carefully, Smartmom went through everything that Crazy Lady had thrown into the hallway. While she organized the clutter into piles, Crazy Lady moved the bed away from the wall, where she found all manner of food and garbage. She pulled his bookcase and his desk away from the wall and started scrubbing.

At one point, Crazy Lady went halfway under his bed, and pulled out a huge plastic box of action figures.

“Don’t throw those away. Those are his treasures,” Smartmom screamed from the hall. Smartmom was doing nothing wrong — it was Crazy Lady she had to worry about. Everyone knows that in order to clean, things must be temporarily moved; everything would be back to “normal” by the time he returned.

Meanwhile, Crazy Lady was tearing through weeks of dirty socks and clothing that carpeted Teen Spirit’s bedroom floor. It was like an archeological dig. She found dozens of ties; leather jackets and eight pairs of skinny jeans buried in the mess.

No wonder he told Smartmom that he needed new jeans. His “old ones” were lost inside his room.

Crazy Lady found enough quarters to buy a week’s worth of breakfast at Daisy’s.

When Crazy Lady saw Smartmom neatly packing up all of Teen Spirit’s clutter, she looked aghast.

“You should toss that in a garbage and pour kerosene on it,” Crazy Lady said with a demonic look on her face.

That scared Smartmom. What if Crazy Lady went too far? What if she did something that would compromise her delicate relationship with Teen Spirit?

“Back off, Crazy Lady,” Smartmom said. Every item was infused with memories from Teen Spirit’s childhood. It wasn’t up to Smartmom to decide what to keep and what to throw away. She could, however, organize it in such a way that Teen Spirit could look through it and decide for himself.

“But this is junk, garbage, things he clearly doesn’t need,” Crazy Lady told Smartmom.

“But it’s his junk,” Smartmom replied. “Hands off.”

Crazy Lady rolled her eyes and went back to work in Teen Spirit’s room. Now that there was less clutter, she could really clean.

At times like this, life with — or as — Crazy Lady is a mixed blessing. She’s a good motivator when a job needs to be done. But sometimes she goes too far. Smartmom has to keep her in line so she doesn’t destroy the family’s ever-tenuous dynamic.

In the days that followed, Smartmom and Crazy Lady worked side by side in Teen Spirit’s bedroom, which smelled of Meyer’s soap, Fantastic and Pledge. For the most part, they got along well, but there were some touchy moments. Smartmom thought she saw Crazy Lady eyeing Teen Spirit’s collection of Tintin books,

“Don’t touch those,” Smartmom told her.

“Just dusting around them,” she told Smartmom.

By the time Teen Spirit gets home from Texas, he may not even notice how extensively the room was cleaned. Smartmom will show him the boxes of childhood stuff that he can go through. No pressure. He can take his time. Just as long as Crazy Lady isn’t around

She gets a little carried away sometimes.

Save the date. The 5th Annual Brooklyn Blogfest is on Tuesday, June 8th at 7:30 PM.

For the 5th year in a row: Find out why Brooklyn is the bloggiest place in America on Tuesday, June 8th at 7:30 PM. Doors open at 7 pm. Location TBD. Admission: $10.

This year the theme is CREATIVITY and how Brooklyn and blogging inspires that.

Here’s your chance to meet your favorite bloggers; learn about blogging; be inspired to blog. This event is for anyone who blogs, who reads blogs, who wants to blog. It is also for those interested in the creative potential of blogging.

“Where better to take the pulse of this rapidly growing community of writers, thinkers and observers than the Brooklyn Blogfest?” ~ Sewell Chan, The New York Times.

Spread the word.

OTBKB is a proud sponsor of the 2nd Annual Lyceum Spring Food and Craft Market at the Brooklyn Lyceum on May 1 & 2 at the Brooklyn Lyceum on Fourth Avenue and President Street in Park Slope.

This year, the Market, a fully curated craft market with handmade wares, will occupy both floors of the historic Brooklyn Lyceum, formerly a public bath. Clocks, hats, art, bath and body, kids’ products, and much more, the Market will feature local, crafty food – artisanal delights like pickles, chocolate, jam and more, as well as classes and workshops both days

Should be fun!

This week’s OTBKB artist pick of the week is: Bicycle Paintings and Custom Bicycle Portraist by Talia Lempert.

You’ve heard of dog portraits, well this artist will do a portrait of your bike. What a cool idea. Describing her work, Lempert writes:

Bicycles are important, beautiful,
and worth a close look.

Most bikes I paint are, or have been, used daily
for transportation, recreation,
messenger work and/or for racing,
They are worn and customized uniquely,
being at once a specific bike
and a collective symbol of empowerment.

OTBKB is at Writers at the Beach. Content will be spotty this weekend! See you Monday.

All hail the WPA: CasaCara

What to do with built-in soap dishes: Apartment Therapy

Ikea bedside chair: Design Sponge

Details: Brooklynometry

Late Nigh bass player lives in Greenpoint: NY Post

Controversy at a Bed-Stuy playground. Should there be a jail in an imaginary play space for Brooklyn kids. Parents say no and they’re offended that the NYC Housing Authority put it there in the first place.

Here is the original post from Black and Brown News, which ran a photograph of a jail sign in a Bed-Stuy playground that has caused much consternation and controversy.The New York City Housing Authority responded quickly to these recent complaints and painted over the sign yesterday.

There is no kind, gentle, diplomatic way to describe the offense against a community by this ‘Jail Playground’ on a New York City Housing Authority property, located at Tompkins Houses (Park Avenue between Tompkins and Throop) in Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn, where Black and Latino children live and play. (Disproportionately, Black and Latinos enter the criminal justice system. Encouraging young Black and Latino children to first play in Jail until they may actually get to jail or prison is playing loosey-goosey with their young, impressionable psyche and something no community should stand for or be subjected to).

Mr. Mayor Bloomberg, whether or not the word “Jail” was painted on after the City erected the apparatus or it came manufactured with “Jail” written on it, this egregious offense still falls on the City to take corrective action immediately.

From the NY Times:

But on Wednesday after the Black and Brown News article was picked up by Brownstoner and other sites, Housing Authority workers arrived to paint over the “Jail.” Later, another worker showed up in painter’s pants and began scouring off the word “Jail” and the fake bars, which appeared stenciled into the play set, with steel wool and paint remover.

The authority, Ms. Stainback said, “painted over the equipment as a temporary solution to replacing this part of the playground.” The authority is also looking into who ordered the equipment.

Anyone who has been through the public high school admissions process knows how difficult it is. But this new wrinkle takes the cake. On Wednesday 8th graders were supposed to find out where they will be going next year. But that didn’t happen. See this excerpt from the New York Times.

Eighth-grade students will indeed have to wait at least one more day before they can find out where they will attend high school next fall.

Admissions letters were expected to be handed out to students on Wednesday, but the Department of Education is under a court order not to distribute the decisions. The order stems from a pending lawsuit from the United Federation of Teachers and the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People over plans to close several high schools in the city, and a justice in State Supreme Court in Manhattan ruled this month that the city should not make the matches.

Here’s an excerpt from NY 1:

Facing severe cuts under Governor David Paterson’s proposed budget, Schools Chancellor Joel Klein told the City Council’s Education Committee Wednesday that 8,500 teachers could soon be laid off.

The chancellor said in a worst-case scenario the department would be forced to lay off 15 percent of math, English, science and social studies teachers.

State law requires the teachers with the least experience get cut first.

According to a Department of Education analysis, no school district would be spared but the two hit the hardest would be District 7 in the South Bronx and District 2 on the Upper East Side, both losing about 20 percent of their teachers.

“These cuts would bring tremendous instability to our schools and students,” Klein said. “We’d be force to let go outstanding teachers, some of whom have been working in our schools for as long as four years.”

“The children of New York City schools are going to pay for the mistakes that adults made with the economy. And we have to do everything we can to stop that from happening,” said United Federation of Teachers President Michael Mulgrew.

The Brooklyn Flea is tweaking their plans for the spring/summer season. While they won’t be doing a flea in Dumbo this season, they’re going to stay at the Wiliamsburg Bank Building and that’s a win win for everyone because it is such a great space to be in. From  Brownstoner:

If you could hang out at a landmark like One Hanson every weekend, wouldn’t you? So would we—that’s why the Flea is staying there (Sundays only) for the rest of the year! When we said “12 Weekends Only!” back in January, we had no idea the 80-year-old landmark bank would be such a perfect fit for the Flea. Now, thousands of awed visitors and hundreds of happy vendors later, it’s obvious. (Even the New York Times is psyched.)

And starting April 10, we’ll finally be back outdoors in Fort Greene every Saturday at our Bishop Loughlin H.S. homebase/flagship, can’t wait. From April 11 on, we’ll be at One Hanson every Sunday.

We love our new friends at Skylight One Hanson—you too can do events at the bank, just contact them!—and thank them for making our extended stay possible.

And we’re truly saddened that the Flea won’t be in Dumbo in 2010. We tried our best to make a market there happen, but it just didn’t work out. We hope to be back by the water again soon.

In case you got confused, here’s the cheat sheet:
The Flea will be at One Hanson Saturday and Sunday this weekend and next (April 3+4).

Starting April 10, we go back outside in Fort Greene every Saturday (yay!). Starting April 11, we’ll be at One Hanson every Sunday. Both markets will be open 10am to 5pm.

Here are the cuts.

Trains

• Reduced Saturday service on the D, F, G, J, M, N, Q and R trains, and reductions on Sunday for the A, D, F, G, N, Q, and R trains.

• The G will rarely run deeper into Queens than Court Square. On the other hand, there will be increased service on all G trains during evening hours.

Buses

• No weekend service on the X27 express from Bay Ridge to Downtown and the B24 from Williamsburg to Greenpoint. The MTA suggests that X27 riders already use the R train on weekends (since the two lines run parallel), and that the B24 has seen a decline in ridership. The MTA notes that users of the weekend B24 — which runs to east Greenpoint, up into Queens and back — could “transfer” to another bus or train, possibly referring to the B43 (which runs north and south on Manhattan Avenue) or the B48 (which runs east and west on Nassau Avenue).

• No more service on the B51 and the B39 due to low ridership. The MTA suggests taking the J or Z trains over the Williamsburg Bridge.

• There will no longer be overnight service on the B67, which goes from Windsor Terrace, through Park Slope, to Downtown; the B64, which goes from Bay Ridge to Coney Island; and the B65, which cuts through Boerum Hill and Prospect Heights on its route between Crown Heights and Downtown.

Cuts that will not be made:

Trains

• Service on all trains will not be reduced from 20 to 30 minutes from 2 am to 5 am.

• Service will not be reduced on the A line on Saturdays.

Buses

• The B25 — which runs from DUMBO to East New York along Fulton Street — plans to cut this were changed after politicians complained because that line will be the only one to service Brooklyn Bridge Park.

• There will be service on the B48 from Prospect Lefferts-Gardens to Greenpoint on nights and weekends.

O Brooklyn! My Brooklyn! from Heather Quinlan on Vimeo.

Ex-cop fights lewdness charges: Sheepshead Bites

Dog barks on beach: Gerritsen Beach

Got rats? NY Shitty

Green Hill School: The Local

Today’s Landmarks public hearing on 2 Coney buildings: Kinetic Carnival

Google fiber optic trial application: Free Williamsburg

How long do you have to live in Carroll Gardens and not be considered a newcomer? Pardon Me for Asking

Szechuan Delight versus Red Hot II: Fucked in Park Slope