I went to Met Food to buy a Yahrzeit (Memorial) Candles. They have them on a low shelf right near the dishwasher detergent.
A Yahrzeit Candle is a special memorial candle, which is traditionally lit for deceased relatives for whom one recites the Mourner's Kaddish.
It is a Jewish custom to light a Yahrzeit candle at sundown on the eve of the anniversary of your loved one's death. I lit mine a little late: at 12:20 am. And it is sitting in the center of our dining room table. I feel like I should put a photograph next to it or something.
According to custom, one should also light a candle on the sundown preceding the start of Yom Kippur, Succoth, Passover and Shavout.
Special Yahrzeit candles, like the one I got at Met Food, can burn for 24 hours. It is a candle in glass not unlike the colorful Santeria candles you see in the Santeria shops on Fifth Avenue.
Only one Yahrzeit candle needs
to be lit per household. Some people use an electric bulb instead of a
candle today for safety reasons.
Apparently there is no special prayer that must be recited while lighting a memorial
candle. Every time I look at it I think about my dad. I am inspired to read a poem or a psalm or maybe look at one of his letters. Psalm 121, 130,
142 is suggested. I took out the copy of "The House at Pooh Corner" that we read at my dad's funeral last year. We read the last page and a half, the part that begins:
"Pooh, promise you won't forget about me, ever. Not even when I'm a hundred…"
My dad loved that section of the book and suggested that I read it at my high school graduation, which I did.
So what is the meaning of the Yahrzeit candle?
According to About.com:Judaism:
see similarity between a candle's flame and a soul. The connection
between flames and souls derives from the Book of Proverbs (chapter 20,
verse 27): "The soul of man is the light of God." Just as a flame is
never still, the soul also continuously strives to reach up to God.
Thus, the flickering flame of the Yahrzeit candle helps to remind us of
the departed soul of our loved one.
I always put a favorite photo of my mom/dad/grandparents next to the candle (you don’t “have to” light yahrzeit candles for your grandparents, just your parents, but I do on Yom Kippur). Love the idea of a reading, and the one you choose, since you’re right, there’s no blessing for lighting a yahrzeit candle and simply striking a match seems kind of inadequate. I never heard of “one per household.” I have several deaths to commemorate on YK, Passover, etc., so I always keep a supply!
Although there is no special prayer to be recited while lighting the Yarzheit candle, a man should go to shul (temple) during the 24 hours of the Yarzheit, and say the Kaddish prayers (memorial prayers for the deceased)with a minyan (quorum) of men. A woman should appoint a man to do so on her behalf.