BROOKLYNITES HAVE THE BEST VOCABS?

So now we’re not just the most literary, we’re wordy, too. Here’s an excerpt from the Daily News. Read more here.

Brooklynites have the smartest mouths, especially when it comes to vocabulary.

The
Great American Word Challenge launched an educational video game
earlier this month in Times Square, where 300 participants were quizzed
on vocabulary skills.

Test-takers were shown 10 words, with the help of a Nintendo Wii video game.

Each word had a letter missing from it and its definition on the bottom.

Contestants had to fill in the correct letter that was missing.

Some of the words they used were "sequin," "stock" and "arthritis."

The
results showed that Brooklyn scored the best of all five boroughs, and
they beat a special category for tourists, with an average high score
of 21, the highest possible score being 23.

GREAT HOLIDAY CARDS BY BROOKLYN ARTIST

Sorry I got Alex’s email wrong yesterday. Here it is correctly. arichman33(at)gmail.(dot)com.

I got this email from Alex Richman, a photographer and blogger, who lives in Windsor  Terrace. LOOK AT HIS CARDS!  I think they are great.

Email Alex if you are interested in buying his cards: arichman33(at)gmail.(dot)com. His blog is called Sidewalk Photography.

Alex writes: I don’t have
a store in Brooklyn but do live in Windsor Terrace and am selling Holiday cards that I create. 

They are hand-crafted personal New York City
scenic holiday cards.
These original photographs are hand-mounted onto
premium felt finish card stock and come with a matching envelope.  I
was wondering if you would be interested in posting this on your gift
guide.  I’ve attached the Blackumbrella
photos that are mounted. I am selling them 8
for $20 or $2.50 a piece.

 
Also, I created a photo blog that is predominantly focused on
Brooklyn. I include interesting things I see when walking around
Brooklyn, tips and also walking guides.  If space is available and you
are interested I would love to be added to your "Brooklyn Blogs to Know
About".

Menorah
Redumbrella1

THE BROOKLYN SAMPLER: A GREAT GIFT

Fofolle
Got this in an email from my friend, Kathy Malone, of the Brooklyn Indie Market. What a great gift:

Jezebel2_2
Imagine a friend gave you a box filled with delicious-smelling skinnyskinny soap, ingenious holders for soft-boiled eggs called Egg Pants, gorgeous handmade jewelry by wabisabi brooklyn, a striking holiday letterpress card by Jezebel, clever buttons and magnets from Kate Black, and a cool card holder made from the sails of sail boats by Reiter8.

Tillybloom
Nice friend right?

Now imagine that you also got at least 6 (6!) of the following in this box:

–A beautiful tote bag with avalove’s hand-lithographed designs
–a candy-colored diamond acrylic ring from by:AMT
–copper and sterling jewelry by Joanne Tracy
–a silkscreened notepad and collaged card by Fisk and Fern
–a book of fabulous artwork by Robert Mars
a silkscreened onesie by hey punkin!
–a colorful kid’s skirt made by Fofolle
handmade cards that double as portraiture prints by Desira Pesta
–keychains (made either by RePlayGround, 31 Corn Lane, or This is Swigg)
–crocheted goods, like an Ezra’s Cousin scarflette or Alicia Kachmar’s adorable mitten ornaments
–a fantastic denim clutch, bag or cuff by Wanett Clyde
–pretty letterpress postcards by Erin Fae
–a wire and gemstone ring from Kimmchi
–illustration jewelry and prints by Tilly Bloom

No, you can’t pick which of those six items you get. But you know for
sure you’re getting 11 awesome things… And don’t you like to be
surprised? How fantastic is this friend of yours?

samp2.jpgNow here’s the kicker: all of these items are made or designed here in Brooklyn,
by artists, designers and crafters who hail from Bed-Stuy, Carroll
Gardens, Cobble Hill, Ditmas Park, East New York, Fort Greene,
Greenpoint, Kensington, Park Slope, Prospect Heights, Sunset Park,
Williamsburg, and Windsor Terrace, and whose work is available at
fabulous boutiques like Spring in Dumbo, Rare Device in Park Slope, the Brooklyn Indie Market, or online at that one-stop-shop for handmade goods, Etsy. (To learn more about every contributor, download this or click on every item mentioned above.)

This box is so Brooklyn, it’s even wrapped in Brooklyn maps and lined with The Brooklyn PaperBrooklyn Greenway (there’s also a map of the future  and a Zagat’s guide to BK restos inside).

sampl.jpgHere’s the other kicker: It’s $20 (plus shipping), an incredible value for one-of-a-kind work made by your gifted neighbors, curated by Brooklyn Based, and sold by The Sampler,
a San Francisco company whose founder Marie Kare came up with this
brilliant idea of mailing boxes filled with the wares of indie
businesses to spread the word about their work. This month they began a
series of Samplers called City Samplers, packed with goods native to
one place. It launched with their hometown, and Brooklyn Based happened
to call at the right moment and propose a box filled with goodies made
by Brooklynites.

The fruit of our collaboration will go on sale this Saturday at 10 am PST, or 1 our time, online at  homeofthesampler.com.
If you’d like an email reminder when they go on sale, drop me a note at
brooklynbased at gmail.com. Because there is one problem with these
Brooklyn Samplers: there are only 100 of them.

BROOKLYN NAVY YARD IS EXPANDING

This from New York 1:

he Brooklyn Navy Yard will be adding four more acres onto its 300 acre
area as part of the greatest expansion there since World War II.

The project will happen through a process called dredging, where
silt and other sediments will be used to fill an unused basin off Kent
Avenue in Kimball.

Officials say the new land – in addition to an adjacent 12 acres
used by city agencies – will house space for industrial, commercial and
retail space, creating some 3,000 new jobs.

Earlier this month Mayor Michael Bloomberg announced plans for the
Brooklyn Navy Yard Historical Center, which will be housed in the U.S.
Marine Corps Commandant’s residence.

ANYONE KNOW WHERE TO GET A LEATHER JACKET REPAIRED AROUND HERE?

Anyone know where these recent transplants from Manhattan can get a leather jacket repaired?

I just wanted to say that i absolutely love your blog!  my boyfriend
and i recently moved to Park Slope from Manhattan and are instant
converts.  We use your blog as a reference guide.  I had a question perhaps
you may have the answer to.  Im looking to repair a leather jacket with a
small tear in it.  Any idea of neighborhood places which may helpful?

Thank you for your help and keep on doing what you do.

PORTABLE QUEER: TONIGHT AT BARNES AND NOBLE

Erin McHugh presents her new series The Portable Queer, 4×6 hardcovers at paperback prices. Titles include:

–Homo History: A Compilation of Events That Shook and Shaped the Gay World;

–A Gay in the Life: A Compilation of Saints and Sinners in Gay History and

–Out of the Mouth of Queers: A Compilation of Bon Mots, Words of Wisdom and Sassy Sayings. 

Park Slope Barnes & Noble  FREE!  267 7th Ave at 6th St, 832.9066

JINGLE BELL JAMBOREE: MUSICAL EVENT AT OLD FIRST

During the holiday season, Ethan Schlesser produces an event at Old First called the JINGLE BELL JAMBOREE.

Schlesser started the event in 2001, as a way to bring some community healing and togetherness after 9/11.  The event was so uplifting and successful that he’s repeated it each holiday season. Every year, he  brings chorus groups, dancers, community performances, and always a big fun sing-a-long as the grand finale. 

The Jingle Bell Jamboree is a non-denomination family event!  This year we will have MS 51 Show Choir, Brooklyn Tech HS Chamber chorus, Dancewave, Spoke the Hub Dance, the Old First Family String Band – and the Brooklyn Community Chorus. 

The event is on Sunday, Dec. 16th at 5pm at Old First.

KICKING: LOVE POEMS

Join OTBKB’s friend, Jezra Kaye, for a party and reading to celebrate her new book Kicking:
Love Poems. 

40 years in the making, these poems chronicle one woman’s grapple with the ever-changing face of love–from 1960s
communes to 1980s corporations to the wilds of contemporary, middle-aged marriage.

I hope you can be there!

Community
Bookstore

143 Seventh
Avenue

Park Slope,
Brooklyn

(between Garfield and 1st
St.)

Thursday, December
6th

8:00-9:30PM

COOL BROOKLYN PHOTOS/HOLIDAY CARDS FOR SALE

Magicaljpg
I got this email from Alex Richman, a photographer and blogger, who lives in Windsor  Terrace. LOOK AT HIS CARDS!  I think they are great.

Email Alex if you are interested in buying his cards. arichman33(at)gmail.(dot)com. His blog is called Sidewalk Photography.

Alex writes: I don’t have
a store in Brooklyn but do live in Windsor Terrace and am selling Holiday cards that I create. 

They are hand-crafted personal New York City
scenic holiday cards.
These original photographs are hand-mounted onto
premium felt finish card stock and come with a matching envelope.  I
was wondering if you would be interested in posting this on your gift
guide.  I’ve attached the Blackumbrella
photos that are mounted. I am selling them 8
for $20 or $2.50 a piece.

 
Also, I created a photo blog that is predominantly focused on
Brooklyn. I include interesting things I see when walking around
Brooklyn, tips and also walking guides.  If space is available and you
are interested I would love to be added to your "Brooklyn Blogs to Know
About".
Menorah
Redumbrella1
Hanukack

CITY AGREES TO HIRE ADDITIONAL 1,300 TEACHERS

This from NY 1:

The city has agreed to hire an additional 1,300 teachers in order to cut class size in half across the city.

The deal, reached Monday, means the city will have one teacher for every 16 students.

The move follows a drawn out fight between the teachers union and
the schools chancellor. Chancellor Joel Klein had repeatedly said he
wouldn’t agree to a citywide cap on class size.

Senate Democrats pushed the measure.

“There are many inputs that make a difference. We think class size
is a uniquely important one, but we’re working with the mayor with the
chancellor to use the money wisely,” said Governor Eliot Spitzer.

The city plans to spend $258 million overall on reducing class
size, teacher training, additional classes and longer school day

.

LIVE TALK SHOW: LOFTY PURSUITS

Just got an email about this discussion called Lofty Pursuits on Tuesday, November 27, 2007 at 8 pm at the Anthology Film Archives (32 Second Avenue at 2nd Street): Sounds interesting. Here are the details:

Twenty-five years ago, Sharon Zukin published Loft Living: Culture 
and Capital in Urban Change, her landmark work on the transformation 
of SoHo from manufacturing space to cultural locus to residential 
lofts.

Shortly thereafter, the Two Trees corporation began their own project of transformation, changing Brooklyn’s waterfront into the residential neighborhood known today as DUMBO.

In conjunction with the Artists Space exhibition On Being: An Exhibition, CUP is pleased to present Lofty Pursuits, a live talk show featuring sociologist Sharon Zukin and Jed Walentas, vice-president of Two Trees.

Zukin and Walentas will discuss culture, capital, and real estate from SoHo to 
DUMBO. This special edition of People and Buildings will be filmed as a live talk show.

Don’t miss the chance to be part of the tudio audience.

Sharon Zukin teaches sociology at the CUNY Graduate Center and at Brooklyn College. Zukin’s previous books include The Cultures of Cities, and Landscapes of Power: From Detroit to Disneyland, which won the C. Wright M. Mills Award.

Jed Walentas started his real estate career with the Trump Organization in 1996. Jed left for Two Trees after the Giuliani administration agreed to rezone the DUMBO 
neighborhood.

In the ten years since its arrival, Two Trees has done $2 billion in work, building 759 luxury condominiums, 500 rental apartments, and transforming millions of square feet of industrial buildings into office space.

LOFTY PURSUITS
Tuesday, November 27, 2007 at 8 pm
Anthology Film Archives
32 Second Avenue (at 2nd St.)
F/V to 2nd Ave
New York, NY

WORLD AIDS DAY MEMORIAL SERVICE AT ST. AUGUSTINE’S CHURCH IN PARK SLOPE

The Gay Ministry at St. Augustine’s Church is organizing a World AIDS Day Memorial and the Ribbon Project. A row of ribbons bearing the names of people who have died of died AIDS will
be installed around the iron fence of St. Augustine Church early this
week and will serve as a dramatic reminder that we all
need to keep fighting this world-wide epidemic.

The group asks that people send in names as soon as possible. Here’s a note I received this morning from one of the organizers. For information or to send names email: mmsomerville(at)mindspring(dot)com.

 

As some of you may know,  I’m
working with the Gay Ministry at St. Augustine Church in Brooklyn.
We’re planning a World AIDS Day Memorial Service there on Dec. 1, 2007,
World AIDS Day. 

The service will be an all faiths service during which names of people who
have died of AIDS will be read aloud.

There’s a brief, exciting program; The New York City Ambassador Chorus, which
is, as I understand it, a ‘chamber’ offshoot of the famous NY Gay Men’s
Chorus will perform and AIDS Education Expert Christobal Jacques will talk.

If you can, please attend the service. Even if you can’t make the service —
and if the gesture feels right to you — please take part in the Ribbon Project.
A row of red ribbons bearingthe names of people who have died of AIDS which will
be installed around the iron fence of St. Augustine Church early this
week will serve as a reverent, dramatyic and vibrant reminder that we all
need to keep fighting this world-wide epidemic.

If you want to remember a loved one by name, just send me the name. If you
have dates of birth or death or both, please send those too. If you want to use
only first names or informal / nick-names, that’s fine too.

The prayer service will not be Catholic service.  It will,
however, take place inside a church.

The deadline for sending names is let‘s say — about November
30th
— Soon! All it takes is a moment. The more names we have, the
more powerful the installation will be!

Please pass this on to anyone who might wish to have the information.


 

PARK SLOPE GROUP MEETS WITH DEPT OF HOMELESS SERVICES

Read Rabbi Andy Bachman’s blog about the  meeting last week to talk about a neighborhood response to the homeless men of Old First and the homeless in Park Slope in general.

Rev Dan Meeter and I hosted a meeting with participation from the Deputy Commissioners of the New York City Department of Homeless Services
(George Nashak), the Assistant Commissioner of DHS (Jody Rudin), a
member of CBE, two members of Old First, and a representative from the
Park Slope Civic Council.

We began with a teaching from the
morning blessings in our Siddur–”Praised be the Eternal God who clothes
the naked; who lifts up the fallen; who frees the captive.” In our
daily prayers, we fortify ourselves with the knowledge that caring for
those who can’t fully care for themselves is our sacred responsibility.

And
then the Deputy Commissioner spoke. He told us that under Mayor
Bloomberg, the DHS has the perspective that if there’s a problem with
homeless people, it’s their fault–they’re not getting the information
to those who need it. And he proceeded to educate us so thoroughly and
with such inspiration that within 90 minutes we had coalesced around a
strategy for responding to the problem and challenge of the chronic
homeless who sleep and relieve themselves on the steps of Old First.

We agreed on 4 basic principles.

1.  Acknowledge with dignity those who are homeless.  Look at them.  Greet them.
2.  Work for their dignity and safety.
3.  Connect them to the variety of homeless services in the city.
4.  Support the provision of services to these people…

READ THE REST ON ANDY’S BLOG.

BROOKLYN PLAYGROUND NAMED FOR SLAIN COP

Prospect Park Playground will be named for a Brooklyn police officer who was killed in the line of duty.
This from NY 1:

The city will dedicate Prospect Park playground to Officer Dillon Stewart at a ceremony Monday morning.

The five-year veteran of the force grew up in Brooklyn.

He was shot dead while trying to stop a car for a traffic violation in East Flatbush in November 2005.

Allan Cameron was convicted of killing Stewart.

He was sentenced to life without parole earlier this month.

HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE 2007: CHECK IT OUT

Home_goods_2
The OTBKB Holiday Gift Guide is a work in progress. But you can check it out as I go.

Yesterday I started on the 2007 Holiday Gift Guide and I did just about all the stores on Fifth Avenue from Degraw to Fourth Street, as well Knit Therapy, Orange Blossom, and Mandala on Lincoln Place east of Seventh Avenue.

So take a look at the gift guide. There’s still a lot missing. But I will be filling in as I get around town over the next few days. Check it out.

The photo shown is a new store on Fifth Avenue called Brooklyn Mercantile, which may be a one-stop-shopping paradise for Hanukah/Christmas gifts. They’ve got a variety of interesting items to choose from including, journals, runners for festive tables, candles, glassware, plates, vases, artwork, soaps, and more. Very unusual selection.

SMARTMOM: IN SICKNESS, HEALTH & OPERA

Here’s this week’s Smartmom from the Brooklyn Paper:

On Saturday afternoon, Smartmom was in a quandary: the Oh So Feisty One had a temperature of 100.7, her head was pounding, and she said that it hurt to swallow.

There were other telltale signs that the OSFO was sick: Her eyes were glassy, she was uncharacteristically droopy, and she just wanted to sleeeeeeeeeeeep (yes, with that many e’s!).

Smartmom knew that OSFO was down for the count. But Smartmom had longstanding plans on Sunday to attend “Later the Same Evening,” an opera based on the paintings of Edward Hopper, composed by her friend John Musto at the University of Maryland more than four hours away.

That meant that she’d have to leave the house on Sunday at 9 am and wouldn’t be home before 11 pm.

Smartmom was stressing. She knew that OSFO would want her to stay home. She’d already made that perfectly clear: “You’d go to an opera rather than stay with me?”

But Hepcat was urging her to go. “We’ll be fine,” he said, and Smartmom knew it was true.

He’d be home all day Sunday. So would Teen Spirit. Even Beautiful Smile, their babysitter of 16 years, had called to say that she wanted to sit with OSFO, too.

Still, Smartmom was stressing. On first glance, it was a no-brainer. Of course a mother should stay home with her sick child. That’s part of the job description.

Smartmom has luminous childhood memories of being sick and lying on the low couch in the living room of her family’s Riverside Drive apartment watching “Father Knows Best,” “I Love Lucy,” and “Leave it to Beaver” (re-runs! Please, she’s not that old).

Her mother, Manhattan Granny, would bring Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup and cinnamon toast on a tray, fluff her pillows, and pay extra special attention to Smartmom (because her twin, Diaper Diva, was at school).

When Teen Spirit and OSFO are sick, Smartmom tries to emulate her mom. She even has a special tray that she uses to serve Progresso Chicken Noodle Soup and cinnamon toast.

Now you can understand why Smartmom couldn’t make up her mind about the opera. Her friend had already bought the $200 round-trip train tickets and a day of gab and gossip on a train with her best high school gal friends would be a gas (despite the expense of the Amtrak fare. Smartmom admits that she blanched at the cost. Why is train travel so expensive in this country? Do they want us all to drive?)

The delightful train ride and opera was countered by a different image: OSFO lying in her bed with four fluffed pillows, a tray of chicken noodle soup, but no mommy.

So for a few moments, Smartmom was back to staying in Park Slope, keeping an eye on her sick little OSFO, who seemed to take an inordinate pleasure in ringing a blue bell to summon her mother and calling “Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!”

Ring. Ring. Ring. That ringing was getting on Smartmom nerves. If that OSFO has the energy to ring that thing so vigorously, she doesn’t need Smartmom to stay home from the opera. And if her throat hurts so much, why is she SCREAMING?

Besides, Smartmom loves Musto’s music and is a huge fan of Edward Hopper.
Naomi Village: In the heart of the Poconos

Smartmom didn’t know what to do and decided to take a wait-and-see approach. When OSFO popped out of bed, on Sunday morning, Smartmom decided that she was well enough for Smartmom to go. Then she took her temperature, which was still hovering around 100.

“Just go,” Hepcat counseled and Smartmom did.

When Smartmom and her friends met up at Penn Station, they found out that there was a power outage on the lines between New York and New Jersey. Every arrival and departure was delayed by more than an hour and no one seemed to know when the lines would be fixed.

Smartmom knew the decision had been made for her. Even when her friends decided to get a car and drive down to Maryland, Smartmom knew she wouldn’t be going.

By 11:15 am, Smartmom was back in the apartment on Third Street. She ran into OSFO’s room, “I’m here,” she cried feeling very heroic and maternal.

OSFO couldn’t hear her. She was wearing headphones and watching something on YouTube. When she finally looked up she seemed mildly pleased that Smartmom had returned and then went back to her YouTube video.

No matter. Smartmom was home. Exactly where she wanted to be.

“Hey, you want some cinnamon toast?”

PHOTO BLOGGER HAS A GALLERY SHOW IN PARK SLOPE!

Photo blogger and OTBKB fave Lara Wechsler will be exhibiting her GORGEOUS color and black and white Coney Island photos at 440 Gallery, that gallery on Sixth Avenue between 9th and 10th Streets beginning November 29th. There’s an opening on that day from 6-9 p.m.

CONEY ISLAND: THE LOST HORIZON

Color street photography by Lara Wechsler

Nov. 29, 2007 – Jan. 6, 2008

Present day scenes from Brooklyn’s fading fantasy
emporium.

Opening Reception:  Thursday, Nov. 29th, 2007. 6-9 p.m.

440 Gallery is located at: 440 6th ave, between 9th
and 10th street in Brooklyn, NY 11215

Gallery Hours:  Thurs – Fri 4pm – 7pm and sat – sun
12pm – 6pm or call for private viewing.

NEW BLOG ON THE BLOCK: ZUZU’S PETALS

Welcome to the Brooklyn Blogohood, Zuzu’s Petals.

Fonda Sara, owner of Zuzu’s Petals and a rookie blogger, writes on her new blog, Zuzu’s Petals, about party dresses for your holiday table.

They’re real pretty and she’s got them at both the big (Fifth Avenue) and the little (Berkeley Place) Zuzu’s.

She also has a funny post about it being not PC to sell aprons in Park Slope.

Check out her new blog.

My apologies for not getting the URL right. It’s Zuzuspetalsbrooklyn.com

CLEVER DOC WANTS TO KNOW: HOW OFTEN DO YOU CONSIDER YOUR ASPIRATIONS WHEN YOU MAKE DECISIONS?

I don’t know about you, but I am loving Clever Doc’s posts. Clever Doc is my friend and family member, Linda Hawes Clever. She is one smart lady with an MD and a specialty in occupational health. She started an organization called Renew, which you just might want to check out. Here is the ninth question she is posing to readers of OTBKB. If you  missed the others here they are.


Do You Laugh Enough
?
Are You Still Learning?
How Angry Are You?
Do You Feel Trapped?
Do You Talk to People?
Are You Eating Right?
Are You Taking Risks?
Are You Refreshing Your Body and Spirit

Here is a question that gets surprising, even hilarious answers: What can you control? One woman backed down when she suggested, “Your children” and received a chorus of hoots. She revised her comment to, “Alright, alright, you can control where you place a two-month old.”

As much as we would like to, we can’t control the weather, our boss (or just about anybody else), traffic, or prices. We can certainly influence them and we should try to do so, but that’s not the same as control.

Realistically, we can control only ourselves. On a good day. If we’re healthy, well-slept, well-informed, well-nourished, and well-mentally, we can control our behavior, our attitude*, and our aspirations. ( Henry Ford said, “If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”)

Not every day is a good day, of course. A string of bad days may call for learning something new or may call for medical, spiritual, or financial help. But on a good day, and with allies and information, we can be in charge of our own bodies, spirits and attitudes. (How did you do on question: Are You Refreshing Your Body and Spirit?).

We are also in charge of our hopes and dreams. That is, our aspirations. Knowing them keeps us pointed forward.

9.  How often do consider your own aspirations when you make decisions?
Huh? (0 points)
Rarely (1 points)
Sometimes (2 points)
Frequently (3 points)
Always (4 points)

AU CONTRAIRE: THE OCCASIONAL NOTE FROM PETER LOFFREDO

Here’s our pal Pete’s take on an article on the Timesonline website ("An Odd Turn of Affairs"), which asks, Is Infidelity Good for a Marriage?" The article suggests that some marriages benefit from the shake-up caused by an affair:

So, here’s my weigh-in on the subject. Get rid of dogmatic words like "commitment" and "fidelity," first of all, so you can honestly look at your situation.

Like most things I write about regarding relationships, intention is everything. People in a marriage can be "committed" and "faithful" for reasons that clearly crush the passion in a relationship – i.e. – fear of being alone, fear of losing financial stability, insecurity about one’s physical appearance and attractiveness, etc. These are love-Eros-sex killers.

However, on the other side, again, let’s can the dogma. Very often, adults claiming to have "open marriages," arrangements in which extramarital sex is allowed under certain conditions (like "don’t ask/don’t tell" policies), more often than not have intimacy issues and similar insecurities, and as a result, their relationships are neither open nor a marriage. (If you and your partner are so open about sex, why wouldn’t you want to talk about it?)

So, what is to be gleaned from the statistical "turn of affairs" in Mr. Marshall’s article?

Simply this – If you love someone, set them free. Let go of your vice grip on your partner. Stop clinging, get a life, actualize yourself, be interesting and attractive to yourself. What I call "spontaneous monogamy" – monogamy that develops when two people are so in love that they want to experience their sexuality like a laser, through that one person only – is the greatest, deepest, most intense experience one can have as a human adult.

But forced monogamy, which most married couples contract for, is not rooted in love or lust, and basically consists of one partner saying to another: "Even if you no longer are in love with me one day, you still have to stay with me." Mmmm… how attractive is that?

Having an affair as a solution? Hardly.

While it can wake a couple up to the stagnation in their marriage, and therefore can have productive results, why wait until it gets to such a messy point? Shake your marriage up now. Go for couples counseling, that  really challenges your emotional laziness.

Stop taking all of your medications to go to sleep and get it up.

Stop leaning on your kids for meaning in life.

Stop obsessing about money.

And see the new movie coming, The Bucket List, a new film with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman and ask yourself how you would want to live if you knew you only had a little time left. You never know – you might rediscover the Eros in your marriage.

Peter Loffredo (http://fullpermissionliving.blogspot.com/)

ANYONE HAVE PICTURES FROM THE TURKEY TROT?

I was there. I was running and I’ve got the aches and pains to prove it.

But no pictures, no nothing. Unfortunately, the Park Slope Track Club ran out of black backpacks, medals and water. They were expecting about 1,000 registrations but registration was bigger than they expected. I’m sure the great weather encouraged people to register the morning of.

I do know there were photos at the finish line. I assume they’ll be posting them (and times) on the Prospect Park Track Club’s site. But when? Anyone know?

AU CONTRAIRE: THE OCCASIONAL NOTE FROM PETER LOFFREDO

Here’s a T-giving post from our pal, Pete of Full Permission Living

Well, you know I couldn’t resist this one, being the curmudgeon that I am about kids ruling the roost in our overindulgent times. This did my heart good – from the Wall Street Journal Op-ed page yesterday:

Thanksgiving: Great American Holiday, or The Greatest American Holiday?" by Joseph Epstein

…Thanksgiving does have the absence of the heavy hand of dreary gift giving that has put the groans in Christmas, the moans in Hanukkah.

And no one has written treacly Thanksgiving songs, comparable to White Christmas and Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire, which, I suspect, have helped make Christmas one of the prime seasons for suicide. Let us not speak Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, of whose travail we shall all have heard more than our fill as we ride up elevators and pass along the aisles of department stores.

For some time in America we have, of course, been living under Kindergarchy, or rule by children. If children do not precisely rule us, then certainly all efforts, in families where the smallish creatures still roam, are directed to relieving their boredom if not (hope against hope) actually pleasing them.

Let us be thankful that Thanksgiving has not yet fallen to the Kindergarchy, as has just about every other holiday on the calendar, with the possible exceptions of Yom Kippur and Ramadan. Thanksgiving is not about children. It remains resolutely an adult holiday about grown-up food and drink and football.