My Uncle Jay, who died this week, wrote to the Metropolitan Diary in 1991. I found this yesterday when I googled his name. I love the word: laggard.

Dear Diary:

One recent evening on my regular Metro-North commuter train, the time for departure from Grand Central had come. A young conductor stood at a train door looking toward the ramp leading to the train.

The door warning bell sounded. The conductor called out loudly and impatiently to a laggard commuter, “Get on the train, stupid.” Whatever happened to “All aboard”? — JAY W. FIDLER