In this week’s Brooklyn Paper, Paula Bernstein talks about writing “Identical Strangers: A Memoir of Twins
Separated and Reunited” (Random House) with her twin sister, Elyse Schein, which will be released on October 24th. Paula and Elyse interviewed me and my sister for inclusion in the book. They told us that they wanted to meet some twins that weren’t separated at birth to compare notes. It was a fun tea at Sweet Melissa’s and the two writers capture it beautifully in their book. I am honored to be a small part of this fascinating and poignant memoir. Here’s an excerpt from Paula’s P.S. I Love You column in the BP. In it she worries that maybe she was too honest in the book.

I made a concerted effort to
portray myself realistically, warts-and-all. Now I worry that perhaps I
was too realistic. Maybe not everyone — even my longtime Park Slope
neighbors — will find my “character” sympathetic. They might not
understand my initial reluctance to be a twin or my hesitance to seek
out my biological family.

With the memoir about to hit bookstores
— and the requisite reading at the Barnes and Noble on October 24 — I
am trying to reconcile myself to the fact that strangers, acquaintances
and friends will know as much about me and my hang-ups as my therapist.
Of course, I want people to read the book, but I am wary of the
attention my newly gained notoriety will inevitably bring.

Am I
prepared for my favorite waitress at Two Boots to ask if I am still
taking anti-depressants or for the helpful saleswoman at Otto to
analyze my relationship with my sister? I dread the thought of
neighborhood moms shaking their heads and clucking behind my back at
Tea Lounge after reading all about my abandonment issues.

The Brooklyn Paper did some investigating and called Apple Headquarters (in Cupertino) and got a denial. Bloggers, once again, are blamed for spreading false rumors.

But the award-winning newspaper did manage to drum up a former Apple store employee, who would agreed to speak annonymously. He told the Brooklyn Paper that there’s been talk of a Brooklyn
shop for at least a year.

“A lot of the higher-ups were asking us
‘cool kids’ what area of Brooklyn we thought would be best [a year
ago],” she said. “I thought either a small store on Bedford Avenue or a
store in Park Slope.”

The bloggers agreed, bandying about
possible sites for Brooklyn’s own enormous cube of a building on Smith
Street, in DUMBO, Downtown Brooklyn, and Williamsburg.

I found these insightful words on Andy Bachman’s blog. He is the rabbi at Congregation Beth Elohim in Park Slope. 

Be kind and honest in how you look at yourself. The Fast is enough
inflicted punishment for one day. Allow the Fast to allow you to focus
on what truly matters: your actions in the last year; your intentions
in carrying out those actions; and what you may do to improve (not
miraculously solve) those relationships in need of healing in the year
ahead.

May each of you have a Meaningful Yom Kippur Fast and
emerge at Havdalah tomorrow evening with Eyes Wide Open and Hearts
Prepared to bring more justice and peace to our World.

Alice Waters came to Brooklyn recently to make lunch in that apartment of Kim Severson, who writes for the New York Times. They shopped at the Union Square  Greenmarket and cooked in a Severson’s brownstone kitchen. I wish she’d visited the Food Coop. Here’s the New York Times’ article.

Did anyone see Alice, the great restaraunteur slow food/local ingredients revolutionary, who owns Chez Panisse in Berkeley, when she was here?

Also, read Alice Waters’ first blog post on the Times’ diner’s journal.

WHEN Alice Waters is coming over to cook lunch, the first thing you do is look around your house and think, I live in a dump.

Then you take an inventory of
the pantry. The bottles of Greek and Portuguese olive oil, once a point
of pride, suddenly seem inadequate. And should you hide the box of
Kellogg’s Raisin Bran and jettison those two cans of Diet Pepsi?

At
the end of the afternoon, when the last peach was peeled and my kitchen
was stacked with dirty pots, it didn’t really matter. Ms. Waters was
either too polite or too distracted to mention what was in my cupboard.
It turns out she travels with her own olive oil, anyway. And homemade
vinegar. And salt-packed capers.

Ms. Waters had agreed to spend a
hot September day shopping with me at the Union Square Greenmarket and
schlepping back to my first-floor apartment in brownstone Brooklyn to
make lunch.

Here’s this week’s Smartmom from the award-winning Brooklyn Paper. The SNA newspaper of the year just won a new award from the Independent Free Papers of America, which cited the paper’s July 28 editorial, “Marty’s blind spot."

Blanche DuBois in Tennessee Williams’s famous play, “A Streetcar
Named Desire” says, “I have always depended on the kindness of
strangers.”

But Smartmom begs to differ.

It’s the strangers
who turn into friends that Smartmom depends on. And that’s what
micro-community is all about. Indeed, it’s the small community
groupings that form within a larger community that make it such a
soulful place to live.

Here in Park Slope, there are many
intersecting micro-communities brought together by blocks, schools,
civic causes, PTA’s, cafes, running in the park, dogs, the Y, the
Community Bookstore.

Smartmom was reminded of this last week when
she got a call from a friend with the sad news that a mutual friend’s
father died suddenly on Rosh Hashanah.

In less than an hour,
e-mails were flying back and forth about carpooling to the funeral in
Westchester and where people could send money in their friend’s
father’s name.

This spontaneous show of love and support
impressed Smartmom. It is during tough times that the small gestures of
friendship mean so much. A card. Flowers. A phone call. It helps to
know that your friends are ready, willing, and able to do whatever
needs to be done.

This particular micro-community of women became
friends at PS 321. Smartmom met one of them in a rambunctious playgroup
that convened in Smartmom’s living room when the Oh So Feisty One was
an oh so feisty 1.

She and Smartmom have been friends ever since. They now share a therapist, a meditation circle, and numerous cosmetics catalogs.

Smartmom’s
writer’s group is another one of these micro-communities. On 9-11, when
the firefighter husband of one of the writer’s in the group perished at
the World Trade Center, the members sprung into action to do whatever
they could to help their friend and her son.

In the 10 years
they’ve been meeting, this group of writers have supported one another
through the thick and thin of death, divorce, the quest for an agent,
and writer’s block.

Then there’s the micro-community of the moms
that Smartmom met when OSFO was in pre-school at Congregation Beth
Elohim. At least four times a year, they meet for a “mom’s dinner.”
These hard-to-schedule events are cherished as a chance to catch up and
share what’s going on.

Last summer, only three of them managed to
get together for a quick dinner at Sette one humid night. But that
meant a more intimate conversation and more Italian rosé to go around.

While nibbling on the restaurant’s delicious
and decadent Parmesan fritters, Smartmom fretted because she didn’t
know where Teen Spirit was going to high school in the fall. History
Mom, a teacher at a Manhattan private school, told her about a school
(let’s call it “Hippie School”) that would be perfect for him.

“Call them,” she said. “I just have a feeling it might be a good fit.”

Smartmom
knows enough to listen to her smart friend. When she called Hippie
School the next day, nobody picked up the phone. Later, she tried the
cellphone number listed for Hippie School’s parent coordinator.

The
principal answered and the rest is history. Apparently his Blackberry
was broken and he’d borrowed the parent coordinator’s cell.
Coincidence? Fate? You be the judge.

Teen Spirit is now enrolled at this unique school, and Smartmom got History Mom a bouquet of flowers from Zuzu’s Petals.

“I didn’t do anything!” History Mom exclaimed.

“Yes,
you did! Your suggestion set it all in motion. It’s all because we got
together for dinner the other night,” Smartmom said.

Then there’s
the ad-hoc micro-community that is Third Street (on the north side
between Sixth and Seventh Avenues). Last Spring, when a neighbor was
dying of cancer, neighbors shared their shock and grief and tried to
figure out how to be of help. It was one of the most difficult things
this micro-community has had to face.

Sometimes, there is pain. But more often there are shared bottles of wine, impromptu BBQs and sidewalk conversations.

The
other evening, Smartmom saw a Third Streeter saying goodbye to her son
as he got into a car bound for college in upstate New York.

Smartmom
watched as this strapping young man she’s known since he was 5 hugged
his mother and brother. While she did shed a tear, she knew enough not
to interrupt this moment of tenderness.

Listening. Caring. Networking. Yenta-ing. Wanting to solve one another’s problems. That’s what micro-community is all about.

A micro-community grows together
and offers love and support as needed. It’s about knowing when to help
and when not to intrude. Subtle. Heartfelt and real: these
micro-communities are a source of strength.

So Blanche, it’s not the kindness of strangers. It’s the strangers who become friends that are worth believing in

That’s right. The Jewish Daily Forward has an article about Chocolate Girl, the new Kosher candy shop on Seventh Avenue between 11th and 12th Streets in Park Slope.

Owner Tziporah Avigayil Jaeger is making etrog jelly-filled chocolates
for Sukkot. I’m “trying to draw on the holiday. This is something that
captures [its] essence,” said Jaeger, an Orthodox Jew and veteran
candy-maker who has been selling chocolates wholesale for the past two
years. “Otherwise, there’s really nothing specific for Sukkot.”

You won’t want to miss tomorrow’s BROOKLYN READING WORKS reading at the Old Stone House at 8 p.m. because:

1. It’s the first reading of the year at Brooklyn Reading Works.

2. This year, there are many interesting readings planned and Rudy Delson’s is a great one to start with.

3. Rudy Delson is a hot new author with a hot new book called Maynard and Jennica, a very New York love story told by an astounding number of narrators. It’s ambitious, funny, smart, deep. This is sort of his first reading. He is doing a reading at Barnes and Noble in Manhattan today. But tomorrow at the Old Stone House will be a real EVENT.

4. It should be way fun to hear Rudy read from his book. Benjamin Kunkel, co-founder and editor of N+1, and others will be reading.

5. Rudy is bringing cheese with labels and wine from Red, White, and Bubbly. I am bringing goodies, too.

6. The Community Bookstore will be selling books.

7. Learn a little American History while you’re sipping wine.

So we finally tried NoNo Kitchen.

NoNo stands for North of New Orleans to those who don’t know. And the fare at this eatery on Seventh Avenue between 7th and 8th Streets is Cajun with some traditional southern cooking thrown in for good measure. It’s also fresh, delicious and nicely served. In fact, the service is very attentive and they have a good beer and wine list.

Love the corn bread.

But what a deal. On Monday-Thursday nights they have a $25. prix fix and it’s a lot of good food. The PF comes with an appetizer, a soup or salad, a main course and a delicious dessert.

We were impressed. Plus it’s a pleasant restaurant to sit in. For appetizers we tried the fried okra, the popcorn catfish and the Jambalaya Won Tons. For entrees, I had the Shrimp Creole, which was not on the Prix Fix menu. It was very good. Hepcat and Teen Spirit had the salmon, which was on the PF. And OSFO had the smothered steak, which was DELISH and EVERYONE at the table was stealing bites.

Frankly, I was surprised no one ordered the Honey and Cane Syrup Slow Roasted Pork Tender Loin Tender Pork Loin Served with Poor Man’s Gravy Cornbread Dressing & Vegetables. Yum, that sounded good.

Yes, we will return to NoNo kitchen when we’re in the mood for hearty good eats and Arrogant Bastard beer. It’s perfect for the winter months. Jamalaya. Creole. Ribs. Roasted Pork Loin. Steak. Hearty, hearty good stuff.