POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_HEARTS DAY

Valentine’s Day and no flowers. No nothing. Bupkis. But I’m used to it. Husband hates, what he calls, the Hallmark holiday. Plus, he’s still sick, and he’s stressed out about one thing or the other.

Daughter made sugar cookies with blue and green sprinkles (?) for her classmates. She loves holidays, especially the ones that involve presents and candy. I gave her and  babysitterandsomuchmore a box of chocolates.

Overall a very blah day. Out on the street, it was anything but. I never saw more people walking with flowers: long white boxes, Korean market bouquets, , single roses in plastic, flowers from Zuzu’s. I even saw John Tuturro walking up Garfield with a large bouquet of flowers. Not that’s a Park Slope celebrity, beloved by all, who keeps a very low profile.

At 7 p.m. there were still men shopping in The Clay Pot. Tutta Pasta was packed. They had a tacky looking glitter heart on the bar. The cool sushi place had candles and a vase with a single rose at each table. At PS 321, there were heart shaped cookies on the counter in the administration office.

My daughter made beautiful valentines, wrote adorable messages, spread the love. Exhausted after piano lessons and American Idol, she fell asleep on the big red chair on the living room. She’ll sleep through anything now.

REUNION PLANNING 2-13

GRACIOUS HOST ordered delicious platters of sushi for the third meeting of the planning committee for the 30th high school reunion of the Upper West Side high school that no longer exists.

MAGAZINE PUBLISHER brought an incredibly thorough list of possible venues for the reunion. The group tentatively decided on an Italian restaurant not far from where the high school was located. The group is set to meet there in March for a tasting menu.

Progress is being made tracking down missing classmates. Someone from the class of 1975 attended the meeting and promises to notify his classmates as well. We were informed that the class of 1977 have had two (count ’em) two reunions and NEVER invited anyone from our class.

A member of our group made a motion disallow that class from attending our reunion on the grounds that they left us out twice. Rejected. There were some great people in that class.

Apparently their reunion was more low-key. It was held in someone’s apartment. And they didn’t have a show or anything. Figures.

There was a heated discussion about what to charge for the event. Most in the group felt that $100 dollars per person was fair and would cover costs. SCHOOL DIRECTOR felt that it was a bit steep, especially for teachers. "You all look pretty affluent," she said. "But not everyone is." The group decided not to charge teachers for the event. We also agreed that there should be a scholarship fund for those who could not afford to come.  The bigger problem is: how do we communicate that without making people feel uncomfortable. It was decided that HEDGE FUND, who is chair of the Finance committe, would be charged with figuring all that kind of stuff out. He wasn’t there to disagree.

SCREENWRITER and I presented our ideas for a 30-minute program of speeches, video, music, and possibly a karate chop demonstration by our zany principal, something he did at our high school graduation. We want to touch briefly on the history of the school, why it closed, etc.

The group asked OPERA SINGER if she would perform an aria at the reunion. She seemed a little uncomfortable with the idea. She had something lighter like a Gershwin song in mind.  There was a request for a reunion of the jazz band but EXECUTIVE PRODUCER, the drummer, didn’t seem interested.

GRACIOUS HOST and SCREENWRITER volunteered to make speeches. EXECUTIVE PRODUCER and CORPORATE LAWYER agreed to develop a comic segment. MAGAZINE PUBLISHER will write a short tribute to our classmate who died. We’ve yet to ask HEDGE FUND or EDITORIAL PAGE EDITOR if they want to make a speeches. The show cannot exceed 30-minutes – people want to talk and catch up, not watch a show – so speakers must limit their words to 3 minutes or less.  BREVITY, please.

The way we’re putting this reunion together is reminding me of the "let’s put on a show" style of our high school life. It seemed like we were always planning something – a trip to West Virigina, a musical revue, a video documentary about Boston busing, a school television show on public access, an economic summit, a jazz performance, a play, a women’s day, a week of mini-sessions, which included student-taught courses in impressionism, songwriting, building a student lounge, exploring New York City, cooking.

It was a creative place to spend a few years. Many in the class feel that our education was a bit spotty and that they were ill-prepared for college. But the school was very much of its time. It was, afterall, the last of the truly progressive schools, where more emphasis was put on a love of learning and a sense of empowerment, than on, well, more traditional pursuits. We did feel empowered – we learned how to  make things happen. That is really the legacy of our time there.

After the reunion, SCREENWRITER, OPERA SINGER, and I went to Kitchen 22, a bar on 22nd Street and did barely any gossiping about the meeting. And that’s the truth. We were reunioned-ed out at that point and needed to think about some other stuff for a while.

BROWNSTONER RE-DESIGNS AND TALKS

Brownstoner has re-designed its site and it looks really spiffy. Mr. Brownstoner will be making a live, in the flesh, appearance at the Design Within Reach in Brooklyn Heights. See below:

We’re going to be giving a little slideshow and talk about last
year’s renovation of our brownstone at Design Within Reach in Brooklyn
Heights on Thursday evening. The talk’s at 8 o’clock but come earlier
for drinks and nibbles if you like.
Directions to Heights Store [DWR.com]

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_Mother-Daughter-Speak

Linguist Deborah Tannen, author of "You Just Don’t Understand," has a new book out that looks at conversation between mothers and daughter called, "You’re Wearing That? Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation."

Q. Many of the women you’ve interviewed for your
new book complain of mothers who criticize their appearance. Are they
right to be annoyed?

A. "Right" and "wrong"
aren’t words a linguist uses. My job is to analyze conversations and
discover why communications fail. The biggest complaint I hear from
daughters is: "My mother’s always criticizing me." And the mother
counters, "I can’t open my mouth; my daughter takes everything as
criticism."

But sometimes caring and criticism are found in the
same words. When mothers talk about their daughters’ appearance, they
are often doing it because they feel obligated to tell their daughter
something that no one else will.

The mother feels she’s caring. The daughter feels criticized. They are both right.

What
I try to do is point out each side to each other. So, the mother needs
to acknowledge the criticism part, and the daughter needs to
acknowledge the caring part. It’s tough because each sees only one.

Q. Is there a unifying theme to your 20 academic and popular books?

A.
There’s certainly a thread. My writing is about connecting ways of
talking to human relationships. My purpose is to show that linguistics
has something to offer in understanding and improving relationships.

There
are many situations where problems arise between people because
conversational styles vary with ethnic, regional, age, class and gender
differences.

What can seem offensive to one group isn’t to
another. I’ve long believed that if you understand how conversational
styles work, you can make adjustments in conversations to get what you
want in your relationships.

Q. Can you give an example of communication problems based on what you’ve seen of mother-daughter conversations?

A.
During an interview, a journalist told me she had called her grown
daughter the night before and began, "I miss you." Her daughter
replied: "Why do you miss me? I just talked to you last week!" The
daughter felt criticized for not calling more often.

After our
interview, the mother tried something she had never done before. She
sent her daughter an e-mail in which she praised and reassured her.

The
next day her daughter phoned to continue the conversation. So you see,
by understanding how language works within relationships, you can
change patterns you’re not happy with.

Q. Why are mother-daughter conversations laden with so many pitfalls?

A. It’s what one mother I interviewed said: "My conversations with my daughter are the best and the worst."

In
the mother-daughter relationship, there’s a lot of talk. For women,
conversation is the glue that holds relationships together. Mothers and
daughters talk to each other far more than mothers and sons, or fathers
and daughters. And their talk is different…

READ MORE IN THE NEW YORK TIMES

MORE SNOW BAGELS

Showletter_2A friend sent me this picture of his neighbor who managed to get his bagels at The Bagel Hole (that’s way up on 12th Street, isn’t it) in the middle of the Blizzard of 2006. He coulda gone to La Bagel Delight, which would have been much closer to his home. But noooooooooo, he had to go all the way to The Bagel Hole.

Go figure. Park Slopers are a hearty lot when it comes to their bagels.

NYC PUBLIC SCHOOLS ARE OPEN

I just checked the Department of Education web site and found out that there will be school for public school kids tomorrow.

ALERT: NYC public schools will be open on Monday, February 13th. Buses will run on regular schedules, but delays should be expected. Parents should exercise judgment in terms of a child’s ability to board the bus and the length of the trip if there are delays. All field trips are cancelled. Afterschool programs and the 37.5 minutes of extended time will operate on normal schedules. (posted 2/12/06, 7 PM)

MUST SEE OPERA AT BAM

This week, BAM presents a spectacular production of "Hercules" an opera with music by George Frideric Handel.

"HERCULES"
Les Arts Florissants
An Aix-en-Provence Festival production
Conducted by William Christie
Directed by Luc Bondy

Feb 14, 16 & 18 at 7:30pm
Feb 19 at 3pm
BAM Howard Gilman Opera House
Tickets for Feb 14 & 16: $35, 75, 110, 135
Tickets for Feb 18 & 19: $45, 85, 125, 150
In English with English titles

He may have been the world

BROOKLYN SLOGANS FROM MARTY

Brownstoner, which has a new look (check it out), had someone take notes at last week’s Brooklyn Height Association Meeting. Seems that Marty came up with some new slogans. What do YOU think of them.

Our faithful correspondent Whitbo took notes for us at last night’s Brooklyn Heights Assocation meeting…

Marty Markowitz spoke briefly and shared some of the top Brooklyn Tourism slogans that are being considered to become our Borough’s official tag line. Here are some of the best:
– Brooklyn: The Bridge is just the beginning
– Brooklyn: It’s like an everything bagel
– Brooklyn: New York starts here
– Brooklyn: The 10th planet
– Brooklyn: In your face and in your heart

Also, in announcements about the recent progress on the Brooklyn Bridge Park, a list of the athletic facilities in the latest plan was read. Along with the requisite softball, soccer, basketball and tennis courts, there are also plans to build a seasonal skating rink under the Bridge itself and topping the list, a cricket pitch! Who’s playing cricket? And much to my chagrin, no petanque courts!


READ MORE AT BROWNSTONER

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_Let it Snow

A picture is worth 1000 words (see above) but here’s the snow report from the Daily News. Supposedly, the Mayor will be announcing school closings after 4 p.m. today.

A massive amount of snow blanketed the city on Sunday, with lightning and gusting snow joined in a rare display above the city’s streets in what meteorologists said was the second biggest storm to hit the Big Apple since records started being kept in 1869.

By 10 a.m., 22.8 inches of snow had fallen in Central Park, second only to the 26.4 inches that fell in December 1947.

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_BLIZZARD

2cbw3785
The snow started around 6 pm; it was wet, mushy, seemingly incapable of being a blizzard (Those weatherpeople always exaggerate about these things.) But over the hours, it began to stick, it began to accumulate. Now the branches of the trees look magical with white snow. (They say it’s going to be 20 inches.)

At Madarts in the South Slope, where my friends Roxanna and Elizabeth had pieces in a show of work based on figure drawing, there was an art opening.

There was a huge crowd there. Huge for anytime. But especially for a snowy Brooklyn night. Met some nice people. Had a glass of wine in a plastic cup.

Roxanna, Ed, and I walked home down Fifth Avenue in the snow. Stopped in at Perch, child-friendly cafe-by-day, cocktail lounge by night. The bartender, Chris B, suggested some incredible scotch, I forget the name.

Buzzed. We walked home in the snow. Barely felt the cold. The trees looked incredible. Walking up Third Street in the snow, the wind was gathering speed.

Son watching Mash on television. Daughter asleep. Husband sick with the the same cold I’ve had all week.

He’s been wearing the black polka dotted bathrobe he never wears. He must really be sick.

They played great music at the bar.

DAILY AUCTION FOR NO WORDS_DAILY PIX

2cbw9618_std_1A BRAND NEW FEATURE ON OTBKB: A DAILY AUCTION FOR THE NO WORDS_DAILY PIX.

Bid on a signed, framed 11 by 14 inch print of today’s NO WORD_DAILY PIX:  "Kentile from F train"

Make your bid as a comment. If you can’t do that please email it to me.

Minimum bid: $30.

Payable by check or cash. If the highest bidder doesn’t show, the photo will go to the next person in line. We can ship anywhere – shipping costs must be paid by bidder.

 

Today’s bidding ends at 11:59 Friday Feb. 10th.

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_REUNION 2/10

There’s another planning meeting for the 30th high school reunion of the progressive Upper West Side high school that no longer exists on Monday.

The e-mails have started up again. I detect a pattern. Soon after the meetings, there are always a flurry of them. Then they die out for a few weeks. And in the week before a meeting: flurry, flurry, flurry.

Our wonderfully eccentric and interesting principal turned up and sent out an e-mail to the group. It sounds like he may be coming to the reunion.  He lives in Tuscon, Az., and just retired as headmaster of a school out there.  I was very fond of him for the long, fascinating stories he used to tell about his moutain climbing expeditions and travels to exotic places. He took a group of us on a backpacking trek to  Shenandoah National Park and I think it was one of the most incredible experiences I had in high school. We stayed in the woods for three or four days, ate freeze-dried food, hiked difficult trails, and saw some of the most spectacular scenary I’ve ever seen.

It looks like the director of the school will be attending the next planning meeting. I remember her best for leading the Women’s Consciousness Raising Group, that met on Thursday nights during 11th and 12th grade  in her apartment (this was 1974-5). I know we staged an International Woman’s Day event and had many talks about why the boys seemed to dominate classroom discussion.

So the pyramid scheme seems to be working. The reunion group keeps growing as more people tell people, etc.

Haven’t heard a thing from PROM QUEEN – we’re guessing she doesn’t want to go back to high school. MAGAZINE PUBLISHER is bringing Japanese sake to the event. GRACIOUS HOST is once again providing "exotic food."

An email went out that another classmate is having a housewarming party this weekend and wants to invite all of us. I almost sent out an email that said: Hey let’s all crash this party, forget about the reunion, and call it a day.  But I didn’t.

There is a "the plot thickens" aspect to the reunion. A real narrative arc. Classmates are surfacing; long lost friends reunited; old grudges uncovered; forgotten moments recalled; thirty years ago is seeming more and more real. Everyone seems to hold a different piece of the memory puzzle — it’s like we’re re-constructing that time again bit by bit.

And it remains to be seen what this event will be. Where will we have it? What will we serve?  What will the program be? Who will come?

Questions remains. The planning continues.

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_THE MUK

The Muk Report has rounded up all the comments he got on his Park Slope
t-shirts and offers them to us with comments. See below. But there are lots more.

You can read the full post and all of the comments here, but below are some of my favorites.  Man, some of you people really know how to get your hate on.  I love it.

Can we rag on the Co-Op more? For me it’s the center of the
self-righteous in Park Slope. All these socialist wannabes in their
expensive clothes standing around looking self-impressed. How many
people does it take ring up some environmentally friendly biodegradable
peanut-free toilet paper anyway? You’ve got about a dozen knuckleheads
sitting behind some table tallying up God knows what and talking about
their latest yoga class." – Billy

"i think we have the same
phenomena here in berkeley ca. not as many volvos. you can see the
outbacks being valet-parked on weekends while the owners are inside
tasting $7 gourmet organic marshmallows and being rung up by the cutest, tattooed little vegan goth babes in those little green aprons." – liza

[Ed. note to self: Renew BurningAngel subscription.]

CHECK OUT THE T-SHIRTS AND READ ALL THE COMMENTS A THE MUK REPORT.

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_PASSING LIKE SHIPS…

Life is different now that Husband has a big job in Manhattan. Last night he came home at 10 p.m. He’s back to his old tricks of working late at the office. Back in the day when he was working for the uber-computer corporation he’s stay until 3 or 4 in the morning. Just you and the cleaning staff – I used to say.

Three years ago – he was outsourced from the uber-computer corporation and we had him all to ourselves. First there was severance – glorious severance. Then unemployment. Then Husband worked hard on his photography career – something he’d wanted to get back to for years – and was beginning to acrue a list of loyal clients.

But he was also around to prepare incredible dinners, pick Daughter up from school, become a major role model to Son. He was so around I was happy to have my office out of the apartment so that we weren’t on top of each other all day. But it was fun to meet for sushi lunch and do other stuff during the day. Once, we went to the Brooklyn Museum during the day. That was to see the Basquiat show and it was a treat.

But now…He’s distracted the way new jobs distract you. He’s stressed in that way that new jobs stress you. He’s busy in that way…

Fortunately he’s still making time for the photography career. On Saturday he will be selling pictures at the Old Stone House…

The last there years were an experiment in trying to survive without full time jobs. Both of us had lots of freelance work and were just about making ends meet. Now we’re back in the race. Thanks to Husband’s new job, we’ve got health insurance (starting in March), benefits, retirement stuff, stock options and all the rest.

Consequently, we’re passing like ships in the night. The family didn’t eat dinner together yesterday.  Husband even missed American Idol. He came home late just like he used to – all tired and spent.

But hey, it’s a living.

WIN A FREE HUGH CRAWFORD PHOTOGRAPH

YOU COULD BE A BIG WINNER.

Pick a Brooklyn street name and if it’s the same Brooklyn street name I’m thinking of you will WIN a free Hugh Crawford photograph.

E-mail me your answer. Or just come to the Old Stone House (Fifth Avenue between 3rd and 4th Streets) on Saturday February 11th to the Design Collective Valentine’s Day Sale. Jewelry, clothing, lingerie, accessories, bags, lots of loverly things.

On Saturday, HUGH CRAWFORD will taking portrait and selling framed and unframed photographs at the OLD STONE HOUSE. The portrait sitting is free – and prints can be purchased on Smugmug.  PHOTOS MAKE GREAT GIFTS.

E-mail me your Brooklyn street name. NOW.

NORMAN AND JOHN MAILER

A reader named Lefty 100 writes to inform us that the most Brooklyn of authors, Norman Mailer, will be at the New York Society for Ethical Culture in MANHATTAN with his son, John Buffalo Mailer, on March 2nd. Thanks to Lefty for the heads up.

NORMAN MAILER & JOHN BUFFALO MAILER

MODERATED BY DOTSON RADER

A CONVERSATION BETWEEN A FATHER AND HIS SON ON
WHAT IT MEANS TO LIVE IN AMERICA TODAY

A unique and unforgettable opportunity to join Norman Mailer and his
son, John Buffalo Mailer, for an intergenerational sparring match as
they discuss their new book, The Big Empty: A Dialogue on Politics,
Sex, God, Boxing, Morality, Myth, Poker and Bad Conscience in America.

A book signing of The Big Empty will follow the event

Thursday, March 2nd, 7:00 p.m.

The New York Society for Ethical Culture, 2 West 64th Street at
Central Park West, New York City

Doors open 6:00 p.m.

FREE. FIRST COME, FIRST SERVE

Presented by Nations Books (www.nationbooks.org) and co-sponsored by
The New York Society for Ethical Culture.

Continue reading NORMAN AND JOHN MAILER

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_DOG PORTRAITS

OttoI ran into Nancy Soyer, someone I went to high school with, and told her abot the 30th reunion that is being planned. She’s from a younger class, but we’re inviting people from other classes as well.

She seemed happy to hear about the reunion and I expect that she’ll want to attend.  I asked for her e-mail and she handed me her card which had a portrait of a dog on it. A really, really cool painting of a dog.

I used to run into Nancy all the time in Park Slope because she was a dog walker around here. "I haven’t seen you in ages," I said. She told me that she’s primarily painting now.

I was really happy to hear that because she’s a very talented painter and her paintings are — gorgeous.

Nancy will do a custom portrait of your dog. She’s obviously quite busy doing them because her web site is filled with paintings of dogs. In addition to the portraits, she sells prints and notes cards. Check out her site if you’re interested.

On her web site, there were these bits of biographical-info: Nancy studied with Marshall Glasier and Julian Levy at the Art Students’ League. In addition, she has trained with Marianne Reynolds and Lydia Riojas. In the winter of 2002, a group of Soyer’s drawing were included in a Moses Soyer show at the Ridderof Martin Gallery of Mary Washington College in Virginia. Her work has also been exhibited at the Phoenix Gallery and Art Students League in New York, and the Feral Art Gallery in Brooklyn. Her paintings and drawings are found in many private collections.

Great to see you Nancy.

POSTCARD FROM THE SLOPE_DUNKIN’

A Brooklyn Life ran a piece about the Dunkin’ Donuts that seem to be popping up around Brooklyn.

As I’m sure many neighborhoodies have noticed, Dunkin’ Donuts has
not set out to invade Carroll Gardens alone. Knowing the terrain would
be difficult, the Double D enlisted the help of his good friend and
often shop mate Baskin-Robbins. It goes without saying that there is
some great homemade gelato in this neighborhood, and I sincerely hope
those businesses don’t suffer. My optimistic belief, given the love the
neighborhood has for its local, family-run businesses, is that most
Brooklynites will continue to patronize their old favorites (or, who
knows, maybe some entrepreneurial spirit will open up an independent
coffeehouse/ice cream stand nearby).

She mentions a  NYDailyNews article about
how the owner of the Carroll Garden’s wants to blanket the area with
the chain. He used to live in Carroll Gardens..

READ MORE AT A BROOKLYN LIFE.

Brownstoner’s two cents.